Little relationship

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29 September 2015

World seems quite a different place when you are in love. It looks better, beautiful and bewitching but more importantly since it is built around the only person you desire to be with, you tend to fall in love with this world also, or just in other words it is love which makes our world different and in my case, it made me a very different person. Yet love is very uncommon belief, unfortunately our world is somewhat filled of disasters and finding reciprocated love is like finding needle in a haystack.

Everyone have their own love story, so do I. She was benchmark of so-called perfectness, and obviously you know who I am, so technically having her in my life is like finding a drop in an ocean. Maybe in coming future science can find a way for that too but my case is next to impossible. Yes, love purposely disables you from feature of reasoning with the facts and I stand here still in love with the same girl since the day one.

Today I thought why to live like this, so I started typing a message for her; ” In this little relationship what we somehow have between us, you know you are the one important, not me, and it’s a fact since only I love you, I am not allowed to expect anything from you. But unfortunately I believe that at least I deserve to know the truth. Is there any problem?? Or somehow I’ve become a problem?? If there is anything wrong we will handle it and if I am the one let me know. It’s not wrong to ask for what you desire and deserve, after all I’m going to love you no matter what happens to us. You ask me to be happy I’ll be , at least I’ll try to be happy but you know what it’s your single smile which worth more than my life . Let me know and you will see me no more”.

The message was ready and all I needed was to press the send button. Suddenly I heard a voice saying, what if she replies it’s you and you need to get the hell out of my life. The next thing I found myself doing was deleting that message. I turned off my phone and said good night to myself as always. I closed my eyes in search of sleep with a thought constantly ringing in my head no matter how difficult she is, I am going to stay by her side, after all I love her. And believe me when I say I love her.

 

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Who?? Me!!

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I’m not helpless

It’s just I don’t need any help,

Yes I cry sometimes, but

My tears shouldn’t bother you

Because you don’t know me

And I don’t expect you to know me.

I’m not depressed or rejected by others

And I’m not bullied by anyone

But you’ll find me sad most of the times

I don’t ask you to pacify me

Because you don’t know me

And I don’t expect you to know me.

You see me and feel pity for me

You see a lost boy who needs some help

But here is the fact you ignore to recognize

Even if I tell you my story

You will never know what I’m feeling right now

Because you don’t know me

And I don’t expect you to know me.

There may be darkness inside me fighting

Or an evil is about to invade my soul

I may be good or bad or someone like you

I love the silence, the dark and the coldness in the winds

I love to be alone, alone with my memories

And now if you think you know me, you’re wrong

Because you don’t know me

And I don’t expect you to know me.

Princess

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A heart so pure was filled with love

Jumping with joy confined in cage of fear

It asked what if the love isn’t reciprocated,

What will happen to the boy holding me dear?

Until the princess walked in

Breaking the boundaries of angst

Heart kissed the open sky and soared in glee

Only to fall tragically on land full of spears.

Heart begged to princess to save its life

Pleaded for the boy’s raining tears, but

Princess walked away turning blind eye, and

That day heart lived its worst nightmare.

Cages are still broken but

Heart, still bleeding, now love living there

A heart still pure but now filled with fear, wonders

What will happen to the boy holding me dear?

 

Apology

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For the days you’ve spend cursing me

For the days you’ve wasted waiting for me

For all those wrong things I’ve done for the right reasons

Reason I drifted away

Reason I couldn’t stay

I am not saying that I never did wrong to you

I’m saying that I only did things right for you

I am sorry I did quit on you

I am sorry I gave up on our love

It’s me suffering from the guilt

And its consequences deep inside

I just wanted to say you

I cried but I never lied

I am still the one who loved you.

King

No throne, no courtiers

But he was the king of his wonderland

Protecting his realm from the monsters unknown

He marked the boundaries with sacred mantras

Now the city is safe

King can sleep finally

No more terrible things, then he heard her footsteps

Mumma see I’ve killed those monsters, he screamed with joy

I’ve killed them all

A thundering slap landed on his rosy cheeks

“Boy what have you done on these freshly painted walls?”

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Return

“Will they ever come back?” The boy asked.

There was no response but only pitiful eyes staring back at him,

Helpless and hopeless, he walked inside alone

Sat on the throne his father left empty

He waited for their return, for months

And when they returned

Deceased, slaughtered on the battlefield

He put on the armour and rode off with his soldiers

His little brother stood there and asked with hopeful eyes

“When will he return?”

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