Late

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Although I was vulnerable in his presence;

But his absence, his absence ripped my heart.

I fought against my own thoughts every day. And then,

When he was gone, everything changed;

There was nothing of me left inside of me.

I was the dead yet waiting to die.

Maybe it was only then, I realised that

I was in love with him but;

It was too late to turn back.

She

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They say everything has a price but she was priceless, even fortune of whole world will never stand equal to her love. You can buy everything with money, and with power you can make the universe kneel on your feet, but you can do nothing to make a woman love you unless she wants it to. I will never come to know that when or how I fell in love with her, but what I know for sure is that – with every breath I draw, with every single second I live, I end up loving her more and more.

Wait

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If you want to go, no matter how much I love you,

I won’t stop you.

I can’t ask you to love me.

All I can do is to do what I’ve been doing since the first day I saw you.

Don’t worry, I don’t expect anything from you.

I never did, it’s just that

You don’t want me and I can’t be of someone else.

Little relationship

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29 September 2015

World seems quite a different place when you are in love. It looks better, beautiful and bewitching but more importantly since it is built around the only person you desire to be with, you tend to fall in love with this world also, or just in other words it is love which makes our world different and in my case, it made me a very different person. Yet love is very uncommon belief, unfortunately our world is somewhat filled of disasters and finding reciprocated love is like finding needle in a haystack.

Everyone have their own love story, so do I. She was benchmark of so-called perfectness, and obviously you know who I am, so technically having her in my life is like finding a drop in an ocean. Maybe in coming future science can find a way for that too but my case is next to impossible. Yes, love purposely disables you from feature of reasoning with the facts and I stand here still in love with the same girl since the day one.

Today I thought why to live like this, so I started typing a message for her; ” In this little relationship what we somehow have between us, you know you are the one important, not me, and it’s a fact since only I love you, I am not allowed to expect anything from you. But unfortunately I believe that at least I deserve to know the truth. Is there any problem?? Or somehow I’ve become a problem?? If there is anything wrong we will handle it and if I am the one let me know. It’s not wrong to ask for what you desire and deserve, after all I’m going to love you no matter what happens to us. You ask me to be happy I’ll be , at least I’ll try to be happy but you know what it’s your single smile which worth more than my life . Let me know and you will see me no more”.

The message was ready and all I needed was to press the send button. Suddenly I heard a voice saying, what if she replies it’s you and you need to get the hell out of my life. The next thing I found myself doing was deleting that message. I turned off my phone and said good night to myself as always. I closed my eyes in search of sleep with a thought constantly ringing in my head no matter how difficult she is, I am going to stay by her side, after all I love her. And believe me when I say I love her.