It’s very hard to drive on the curvy mountainous roads during winter nights. Visibility is very low and due to snow deposited on the black tar increases the difficulty of drivers. But when you observe closely, you’ll rarely witness a lone vehicle on the road; they always travel in packs with one leading the way and others following the lead. The important thing is that they automatically develop a bond with the driver of wheels before them, a bond of unsaid trust, which is maintained throughout the journey.
Luv would have followed me anywhere, even in my darkest moment he was there for me. He trusted me with heart, with his soul and with his life and what did I do? I broke his trust, his heart and destroyed everything between us. I wish I could walk back in time and stop myself from doing all those things I did, but could I? This is the tricky thing about life, once an event has occurred neither you can change anything about it or you can stop the set of events following it. No matter how hard you try to stop them, they are destined to happen.
Tired of crying on my birthday; I was staring at the duskiness spread outside from my hostel window. The night was absolutely calm and anything, except the dense fog covering the entire valley, wasn’t visible. It is the first time in I don’t know how many years that I haven’t seen Luv on my birthday. He never missed my birthday but this year only one hour is standing to this day to be finished and another ordinary day to start. After everything that happened, everything I did there wasn’t even a one in a million chance that he will even agree to see my face.
I remember my first birthday with him; it was similar cold December night, he called me midnight and asked me to come upstairs. When reached there; I saw him standing there, under the dim staircase light, grinning back at me. It was freezing up there and he was trying to hide the chill he was feeling in his bones. His trembling hands were holding my favourite pineapple cake with a single candle burning on it. I couldn’t stop tears from wetting my cheeks; I had never felt so special.
He was very good at pulling surprises for me like he had learned how-to-woo-your-girlfriend-course from Nicolas Sparks himself. We sat there on the roof for hours; eating cake, holding each other under my shawl and taking about every constellation that would have been visible in the absence of fog. That was a perfect night and I cherish all of it.
For me being with him was everything, he was the world to me and I erased the existence of my world from my life. When I see these clouds, I feel like they are also constantly moving around the world in search of their soul mates and when they fail in achieving their only goal, they sacrifice their lives crying rain on people dwelling below on earth.
Even clouds are more faithful than I was.
From what I see, Love brings out the weirdness in people but love itself is beautiful. Love makes lives happier but love itself is sad because not everyone can have a happy ending. There can be a mere sense of satisfaction in a lover when he or she spends all of their lifetimes happily with the person they love but, that’s not the end. One day everything will be sad again because the person with whom they were in love with lives no more and that is what we call a ‘tragic-end’, and then they will start to dream about meeting in, yet to be scientifically proven and I personally don’t approve this theory, afterlife or another world. Even some hopeless romantics believe in reincarnations and several other crazy kinds of stuff.
Basically, there is no romance in real life but only tragic stories.
I feel sadness in my bones but I couldn’t cry. Every time I try to sleep I somehow end up staring the emptiness and darkness around me. I looked back at my empty bed and somehow felt it staring back at me, terrified from the thought of walking bed I closed my eyes and pressed myself on the wall behind. I was losing the sense of time when I heard Whitney Huston on my cell phone singing and-I-eaa-will-always-love-you indicating an incoming call on it. I grabbed my phone and looked at the screen; it was the security guard at the front gate of the hostel. What have I done to receive a phone call from a security guard in the middle of the night, I wasn’t in the mood of talking to anyone so I pressed the silent button.
But it rang again; for sure it was something important else he wouldn’t have called twice so, I answered the phone.
“What happened brother, why are you calling me at this time.” I surely recognised his voice and it sounded okay but then I heard some disturbance over the phone. I ran towards the balcony to see whether I could see anything happening on the main gate.
“Hello! Brother, can you hear me?”
“No, but I can. Rohini I’m sorry I didn’t called you this whole day but then you know I busy in catching trains and planes to reach here. But now I am here and I’ve your favourite pineapple cake with me. Your brother caught me climbing the boundary wall and he wouldn’t allow me to come inside, would you care to come out?”
At first, I couldn’t believe Luv was here but he was really here.
“No” I replied. I don’t know what came in my mind but I’m sure I said no to the only person I wanted in life. Maybe it was my guilt or my fear to face him that overcame my only wish to see him once again but I still have time to correct myself, “No, I would not only care but I would love to”. I said and I ran towards him through the hall ways and then the stairs. I ran as fast I could and within a matter of seconds I was standing in front of him, he hasn’t changed a bit except those facial hairs which weren’t there before when we met last time. I stood there staring at him, I love him and I’ve always loved him.
“You’re looking beautiful, even with those red swollen eyes” he smiled.
“Why don’t you shave?”
Just tell me I’m an idiot. Who asks this type of question? He was constantly looking at me and I couldn’t resist it so I lowered my eyes. I heard his footsteps and every step he took brought him closer to me. I felt his hands on my cheeks, they were familiar. I’ve waited for almost a year to feel this. I looked up, he was still holding my cheeks and I could feel his warm breath brushing my hairs. I closed my eyes and felt the touch of his lips on mine, a soothing sensation ran through my veins and I smiled gently as our lips departed.
Everything was new, everything was happy and I wanted to capture every moment with my eyes when I saw something white settling on his hairs. It was snow falling from the sky. It was first snowfall of this season, maybe clouds weren’t sad this time and maybe it was their way of telling me that now I have to wait no more, search no more because the person I love has crossed the oceans himself just for me.
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